Surviving the Days ... and the Weeks and the Torment.


Words I write don't necessarily make sense to you... I don't expect them to, maybe I don't even want them to... The thoughts are written fragmented and incomplete! I do not write for any form of external validation.. What you read may not have the same meaning as what I write... But do not underestimate the personal significance of my words! An essential part of who I am is only evident in my writing... It had been locked away after it was used against me... Everything you need, in order to hurt me, is right here!

Friday, May 20, 2005

Experience it All

As I go through another of my low, or down periods

I basically just go through the motions of life

Nothing of any consequence is accomplished

Motivation is too minimal, I get stuck on this plateau

This by no means has been a long down phase

And it certainly hasn't been close to my lowest

But as I pull myself out of it I realise so much each time

I'm making a point to actually feel my emotions

I'm not dismissing my thoughts, feelings as quickly!

Almost nothing is felt during a low, I miss what is happening

Everything merely passes by unappreciated, without impact!

I realise there is plenty to gain in allowing myself to feel

The range of emotions from sadness and pain through to joy

Experiencing and knowing what it is I feel, working out why

Giving myself permission to let the emotion go right to my core!

Appreciating the pain in order to truly feel the joy of pleasure!

Taking each moment, each thought and feeling and being thankful!

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