Surviving the Days ... and the Weeks and the Torment.


Words I write don't necessarily make sense to you... I don't expect them to, maybe I don't even want them to... The thoughts are written fragmented and incomplete! I do not write for any form of external validation.. What you read may not have the same meaning as what I write... But do not underestimate the personal significance of my words! An essential part of who I am is only evident in my writing... It had been locked away after it was used against me... Everything you need, in order to hurt me, is right here!

Thursday, February 10, 2005

Seven Tomorrow

Sometimes it feels like yesterday

Other times it feels like eons have passed

Little boy has given me so much of everything!

For me the things that really matter are those felt with the heart

From the very first time I felt him move within me

Through each day Little boy has given me more than I could have imagined

Even the "bad" days of a Little boy pushing the limits end with "I love you
mum"

I never knew emotions, feelings, could be felt so strongly and completely

The immeasurable joy of his birth, the limitless and unconditional love

The overwhelming pride when he spoke his first words

The sheer happiness when he shakily took his first steps

The complete confidence that he can, will, accomplish anything he chooses

The joint sorrow and pleasure of his first day at school

The impenetrable fear and pain when we came so close to losing him

So much of what I feel is beyond what any words could even begin to express

I wonder whether I'm a good mother, but I know that I'm the best I can be

Learning more each passing day of what being a Mother truly means

Not only appreciating each day but cherishing every moment!

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