100 Things (the next 20)

21. In the last 6yrs I've met more than 100 people from online (male and female), I've dated a handful of the guys.

22. The last concert I went to was Moby, in Melbourne.

23. Until last year I'd never been on a plane, had to for the Moby concert. (not in a hurry to jump on another)

24. I love to read. I've read some Stephen King and Dean Koontz books more than 20 times, I also have a shocking memory for books.

25. As I've gotten older I've become less concerned with good impressions. I say what I think when I think it. Those who know me well know how to take me and those who don't, learn or not.

26. When I went into labour with Little Boy I had contractions for 3 days before I went to hospital, I gave birth 6hrs after I got there.

27. I did not have an epidural, I had two shots and gas. Advice to the girls/women - no matter what anyone says or what you think beforehand, You DO want drugs, lots of them. Drugs are good!

28. The first movie I ever remember seeing at a cinema was Footrot Flats: The dog's Tale.

29. I've seen the movie Mannequin, with Kim Cattrall, at least 50 times. Sadly, I think I still know most of the script.

30. I have a very real fear of failure. Most of the time I don't let it win, but occasionally it does. My biggest fear is failing as a mother.

31. Last year I shaved most of my hair off. This year I've decided to grow it long again. Effectively I've condemned myself to two consecutive years of bad hair days.

32. I love Motorsport in most forms but especially Formula 1. While I was with the Ex I gave motorsport photography a go, the adrenaline rush that it provided and the thrill of getting that great shot only enhanced my love of all things loud and fast.

33. In my adult life, the longest I've ever been without a boyfriend is 12mths.

34. The longest I've been without sex is, coincidentally, now just over 12mths too.

35. There has been two moments in my life that I have felt complete terror, vastly different events but sheer fear both times.

36. I gave up smoking on the first day of this year after making a promise to Little Boy to do so. So far so good..

37. I accept people for who they are with only one expectation, honesty. Lies to me are a deal breaker and I will not accept them. My favourite saying is "People with nothing to hide, hide nothing".

38. I'm very curious by nature, if I become interested in something I will find out as much about it as I possibly can and that includes people.

39. On Little Boy's first day of school I felt guilty because I was one of the only mothers not breaking down into tears. My mother and sister both cried but not me, I saw it as a good day not a bad one.

40. As far as celebrity crushes go, I have had one for years on both Neve Campbell and Jessica Alba. I'm not Bi but women can be so much more attractive than men.

Ok so there's up to 40 I'm thinking the next installment will be sexually based, just for the sake of it. ;-)

100 Things (the first 20)

I said a while back that I would get around to doing this. Well I've made a start and got almost halfway. Hopefully they're not too boring for you all and if they are, too bad :-P

1. Ted is my initials. It is what most of my immediate family and some of my friends call me.

2. My parents divorced when I was 5-6yrs old and I am the only child of their marriage.

3. I've lived most of my life in the outer suburbs of Sydney.

4. I took up smoking at the age of 11 or 12.

5. The first boy I ever kissed, my first boyfriend was 17yrs old, I was not quite 12.

6. As a young teenager I was stoned for about 18mths straight. Coincidentally, that is the only time I didn't live in Sydney.

7. At the age of 15 I had moved 15 times. Now at 27 I have moved a total of 17 times.

8. I lost my virginity on New Years Eve, (I was determined to come into '94 with a bang) to a guy I'd met that day, the sex was great and I never saw him again.

9. I have a brother 8yrs older than me and a sister 6yrs older.

10. I did not complete High school, I left after finishing year 11.

11. My first job was 5 afternoons a week in a child care centre during year 11.

12. When I was 17 I was violently mugged walking to the shops for Mum on Mother's Day.

13. I'm fairly sure I've never dated or slept with anyone at all younger than me, ever.

14. I have kissed (more than once) two married men, but never slept with one (that I know of). I knew they were married and knew their wives.

15. I've done a clerical traineeship, which I completed while I was pregnant.

16. I have two younger sisters (18 and 16yr old).

17. I have never had a drivers license, never tried to get one.

18. There is only 1 female (outside of family) that I consider a good friend. I've known her for more than 12yrs and we have absolutely nothing in common.

19. The first time I met my Ex I knew something major was going to happen, but it was not love at first sight.

20. There was a period of 3yrs when I did not speak to my father at all.

Well that will do for now, may put up more in a little while. :-)

Ask and ye shall receive...

Little boy is turning eight in just a few short days

He's growing up, not too quickly, but growing up

I'm hoping he'll go from eight to ten in one quick year

My sis keeps reminding me, nine-yr-old boys are all horrible!

Little boy is not nine and he's certainly not horrible, not yet

What is it that eight-yr-old boys want for their birthdays?

Really, I'm asking you, what do they want? he won't tell me..

I've been asking repeatedly, what he would like for his b'day

To date I've had one response, a book which will complete a series

That's it! What is up with that? Where have I gone wrong?

Why is my child not demanding the latest in game consoles

Why not at least asking for the latest in games for the console he has

No demands for a computer, TV, DVD player or such in the bedroom

No requests for handheld game thingies*, the ultimate in anti-social props

Actually no demands at all. No "blink'n'you'll miss it" fad to dive into

No "must have" bike, toy, clothing, shoes or anything else

One little book and then "suprise me" is all he asks..

Now most of you know I loathe shopping, unless I know what I want..

I like shopping for Little boy, hate wandering aimlessly searching.

I went off to the Mall today, spent a few hours looking and spending

I walked out arms full and quite happy with my purchases except..

The one thing he asked for was nowhere to be found!

Tomorrow I endure another Mall. If only he would ask for more.......


*I had a mental blank okay and thingies was all I could think of!

Ranting Incoherently

We've all seen and heard the stories in the news. Well the offending cartoons have been published by an Aussie now, not in a paper as yet but on a blog .. here. I'm not going to mention his name as I don't think he needs the added publicicty. Yes, I realise that my nothing of a blog is hardly publicity but that's not the point. I also realise that I've provided a link to the blog which kinda negates the anti-publicity but that too has a purpose and it is not to become a part of his cheer squad.

Now I'm all for freedom of speech and such. I don't think the News media should be dissuaded from publishing these cartoons or any others. It is a matter of what is considered "news" and what best depicts that "news". I certainly do not condone the behaviour of those against the publishing of the cartoons around the world, with the violence and rioting.

Having said all that and having read the blog entry which has the cartoons in it, as well as most of the comments that it has attracted and then other recent entries on the site. I find myself asking.. what was the reason behind posting the cartoons? It seems to me that the purpose was twofold. Firstly, attention, simple really. Secondly, I think they were posted to incite anger and rage. I don't think freedom of speech has anything to do with it. In reading the comments I was amazed (although not totally surprised) by the level of racism that came across. The stereotyping and generalisation of an entire religion and the pure hate behind the words is hard not to notice.

It is sad that there is so much "us and them" mentality from both sides. It is sad that the so called "race riots" of late last year seem to be just the tip of the iceberg in this country. It is sad that this country is basically no different to all the other western "civilised" countries when it comes to attitude towards people of a different faith and especially Muslim people.

I begin at home with teaching my son tolerance and acceptance for all people. It is not race or religion that stands a person apart. It is the ugly side of people, the hate, anger and bigotry which should not become acceptable. Sadly it appears we are going backwards in that respect.

Run Away

I've sat here staring at the empty screen, don't know how long

Thoughts flashing only briefly through my mind, disappearing

Emotions running freely for days have all gone quiet, hiding

The fears and the pain, the joys and anticipation merging, nothing

Words that haven't been shared with anyone recently, gone

Yet the need to "purge" remains, ability however does not

Thanks

Haven't got much time to sit today

A couple of you asked if I was alright

My answer to one, "I'm always alright!"

Which is kind of true, I just have to be!

So thanks for your concern guys

I'm a little down and out, but I always get up again!

Surprised, No

It's amazing that I can still give you too much credit

I made an assumption, logical it seemed to me

Yet again your selfishness has blown me away

I sit and shake my head in disbelief, not shock

I should have known better, been more prepared

It is only a positive for me, I'll make the most

Plans are already being put into place, we'll enjoy